You have friends, right? And they have friends? And relatives, too? Well, what are you waiting for? TAP THEM. You don't have to know them well, or even at all. They just have to live someplace you want to go.
That's how I decided I could go to Ecuador without a travel companion. The thought of landing alone after dark in Quito, the capital city, was nerve wracking otherwise. But my childhood friend's husband's uncle's wife (don't bother figuring it out) is Ecuadorian. So I asked Mark, whose aunt it is, to connect me with her.
That's how Lola ended up picking me up at the airport the night I arrived. We'd never talked during the planning stages. The whole thing had been arranged through emails and phone calls between her daughter in Miami and me. Lola drove me to her Quito condo but only stayed one night. She had to get back to the beach-front hotel she ran with her husband in Atacama.
But she did leave me the keys to the place. I stayed there for several days before and after my travels, and met other family members. The condo came equipped with Blanca, the family maid and assistant, who speaks no English. She and I got pretty good at using smiles, nods and advanced charades to communicate.
Continued...
Remnants of my high school Spanish at least allowed me to thank Blanca when she made me breakfast, and make a little conversation with her. And, it allowed me to have a touching encounter with her 9-year-old daughter, who has Down's Syndrome.
The child was afraid of me at first but warmed up after awhile, when I stopped looking directly at her. I just went about my business and let her study me. I pulled out my picture-packed Ecuador guidebook and sat down on the couch in the living room. She came over, getting closer little by little. I pointed to a blue boat and said, "Mire. Un bote. El bote esta azul." "Look. A boat. The boat is blue." I hope that's what I said. In any case, she enjoyed this game, repeating whatever words I came up with for the pictures in the book. If I didn't know words for what was in a photo, I'd say in Spanish, "look at the blue sky."
Inside I was giggling. What a goofy scene. An American using a handful of three-word sentences to teach a Spanish-speaking child to read. In Spanish. Her mother probably was just grateful I was relieving her of child-care duty for a little while and, I assume, that her children weren't disturbing me.
None of it would have happened if I hadn't braved the solo trip from my safe, comfortable home. Surely you have just as many tenuous connections as I do? Anyone else out there done something like this and willing to share the story?
Photo: Blanca and son, busy in Quito condo.
Photo Credit: Ellen Perlman
Most of my travel connections have come from people I've met on the road -- especially travelers from other places who become friends, and we visit each others' home towns sometime later. But some wonderful connections have happened through searching the Internet: people who write to me about something they find on a website of mine, or by someone who I "meet" online as I'm searching for information on a common interest.
The twistiest and most interesting tale I can think of started after a big career disappointment. I decided to treat myself to a trip, and I flew off to Australia on short notice. My Continental flight home went via Guam, and the woman sitting next to me lived there. We talked all the way to Guam, then stayed in touch after we got back to our homes (I live in Arizona). Eventually I flew back to Guam for a visit. That's where the story gets good.
Our love affair didn't last. But being in that part of the world (I never would have gone to Guam otherwise!) got me fascinated with the area -- especially Yap, the islands where they've kept traditions alive. (Most famous, probably, are their big discs of stone money.) I started doing some research online, found a Kansas City newspaper article about a photographer who was by then in Los Angeles. Writing to the photographer led me to her connections on Yap, which led me to a cultural center being built by natives who wanted to preserve and share their culture. I eventually flew there, met them, and volunteered to help however I could. That turned out to be by working with them to build a website. Along the way, I met Peace Corps volunteers and photographed their school, consulted with tourism officials, and was invited to an islands-wide cultural celebration for natives only. But there's more...
Eventually it was almost time to head for home. I moved out of the hut at the cultural center, into a motel in the main town. Down the hall were two friendly German tourists, and across the hall was a Danish woman who had the same name as a famous late-19th-century artist. We all wandered around town together, met for beers once or twice, and exchanged contact info before we left. When I got a job in Prague, I got in touch, and traveled to both Germany and Denmark when I had time for a break. I hadn't asked my Danish friend about her famous name, but when I got there I found (from her amazing art collection) that she was indeed one of the artist's great-granddaughters. Walking into an art museum together, and having her show me paintings of her relatives, was quite an experience.
If I'd been traveling in a couple, or as part of a tour group, I'll bet that these serendipitous connections might never have happened. Going solo, to interesting and off-the-beaten-path places, with a schedule that's not planned down to the last minute, can lead to friendships that lead to more amazing connections. I'm glad you're writing this blog and encouraging other people to do what you have. Thanks!
Posted by: Jerry Peek | December 05, 2007 at 05:57 PM
I love those stories because I can totally relate. The best adventures come from talking with people. I've got the Ecuadorian taxi driver who brought his daughter to meet me later in the day, the Chilean guy on the train in Spain who invited me out to Colorado where he works in a ski resort, and on and on. Those experiences make me feel alive.
Thanks for sharing some of your stories.
Posted by: Ellen | December 05, 2007 at 09:53 PM